Loving yourself

There are many types of love that we have for the people in our lives; love for a romantic partner or spouse, for our family, for our children, for our friends, for humanity, in general, and for ourselves.

We have always been taught that it is essential to love and respect others first, and that it is selfish to consider our own needs and desires. The gift of self love is one of the most important gifts that you can give yourself.  When you love and respect yourself, you have more love to offer those around you. 

By loving yourself you are able to accept who you are despite your faults.  You are able to accept yourself unconditionally, without judgement and without having to live up to certain standards or fulfil particular obligations.

Without a love of self, you are unable to accept the love of another because you may think that you are unlovable. A shortage of self love prevents us from creating the life that we want. If we believe that we are not acceptable then we immediately assume that we don’t deserve success and wealth. We have this inner voice that tells us that we are not worthy of the riches that life has to offer.  

When you love yourself, you will live with a sense of knowing that you deserve all the good things in life and that you will not accept anything less. You are able to appreciate your talents and good qualities, but also be able to notice your shortcomings and work at improving who you are.

Forgiving yourself for your misgivings is another quality that comes from loving yourself. It also means that you honour your feelings and respond to them in an open an honest manner. This includes those uncomfortable feelings like anger, guilt and fear. If we openly acknowledge and experience those feelings that we don’t enjoy, we can address them and then move on with a healthier emotional outlook.

Practising self-love does not mean that you should only focus on yourself and stop caring for others.  Showing kindness to others and demonstrating our affection for our loved ones is key to having a fulfilling life. However, maintaining a balance is essential. You cannot keep giving to others if you do not give to yourself first. It is like pouring water from a jug.  You cannot keep pouring without ever refilling the jug; eventually it will run empty. Like jug, we too, need to refill, recharge, and be replenished by loving and giving to ourselves.